Hello, Facebook Status Update . . . What’s Your Emergency?

Here’s one for the annual Darwin awards.

In early September, two teenagers became trapped in a storm drain in Adelaide, Australia. They had a mobile phone with them. Instead of using it to call emergency services (000 in Australia), they used it to update their Facebook status. → source

Technology in the wrong hands is a dangerous tool. I will now pause while you make your own jokes.

And don’t even think about defending these girls. Yes, I know that it’s better for many to call emergency services rather than only one. I also understand that texting usually uses less battery power than a phone call. Finally, I am well aware that if the girls were kidnapped and couldn’t talk, a Facebook update may have been more appropriate.

I’m betting it was none of the above. Considering that girls generally mature earlier than boys, long-term prospect for humanity frightens me. We’ve all done stupid things, but come on!

On a related note, I’d love to become a fan of “teenage girls trapped in a storm drain for an eternity, OMG OMG”, but can’t find the fan page.

This reminds me of a Steven Wright joke:

The other day at Macy’s the power went out. Fifty people were stuck on the escalator for half an hour.

Either these two girls are absolute idiots or they are visionary geniuses. Only time will tell. But for now, there’s only one thing to say: use your !@#$%^&* phone!

14 Year Old Girl Arrested For Child Pornography

Sexting. We’ve all heard about it by now. But it doesn’t end there. Combine homo-sapiens of teenage years, a primordial soup of raging hormones, lots of extra time (because we’re not busy hunting food and making shelter), an infusion of unbelievable technology that is simple to use, and what do you get? A 14 year-old girl who took nearly 30 explicit nude pictures of herself and posted them on her MySpace. → source

OK, so you slap the back of her hand, give her a stern warning, ground her for a week, and maybe monitor her on-line activities. Right?

Oh, you’re so wrong. The right answer is you arrest her for possession and distribution of child pornography. So there!

Let’s review. We have laws to protect children from becoming objects of pornography. A 14 year-old girl taking nude pictures of herself is considered a child pornographer. Huh! Who’s the victim?

Don’t we have more relevant issues to consider . . . like bank bailouts?

Climate Change Deniers Are Also Holocaust Skeptics?

Here’s positive proof that any well-meaning endeavor and good intention can quickly turn into insincere and downright insulting venture.

Case in point: Global warming as a result of human activity has been debated for decades. We all know and have heard the arguments on both sides. Almost everyone has formed an opinion.

Sir Nicholas Stern advises UK government about the economic threat posed by global warming. According to a recent article in the Guardian, Stern labels climate change deniers as “ridiculous” and akin to “flat-earthers”. → source

In 2007, Ellen Goodman of The Boston Globe wrote an op-ed, stating: “I would like to say we’re at a point where global warming is impossible to deny. Let’s just say that global warming deniers are now on a par with Holocaust deniers, though one denies the past and the other denies the present and future.” → source

Seriously? I personally don’t claim to thoroughly understand climate change, and I’m among a minority of people who do not have strong opinions on this issue one way or another. But I’m fairly certain that those who genuinely do not believe in global warming (as a result of human activities) cannot be compared with flat-earthers and Holocaust deniers.

Also, notice the clever heading of the articles. It’s all about ‘climate change’ not ‘global warming’. Everyone knows that earth’s climate has changed by itself due to natural forces for millennia and long before the presence of humans. Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to say millennia. It can’t be any longer than 6,000 years, of course! That was back when humans saddled dinosaurs and rode them like cowboys. If you believe that, please purchase your Creation Museum tickets here.

The point is that the old ‘global warming’ term always carried the implication that the current situation was a direct result of human activity. The new term ‘climate change’ insinuates natural causes; therefore, skepticism suggests mental disability.

Nice try.

Steve Ballmer’s 1986 Commercial Selling Windows 1.0

The video speaks for itself.

Accidental (NOT!) Space Collision Of Satellites? Yeah, Right!

I haven’t been blogging too much recently because there’s just nothing good to blog about.

The recent crash of space satellites, however, has precipitated a deluge of conspiracy theories. Anyone who knows me is well aware that I’m not a conspiracy nut, but this is just too good. I’ve been skimming the blogs and here’s what I’ve been able to piece together from the collective. 

By now, we have all heard about the space collision of two satellites on Tuesday, 2/10/09. An American communications satellite and a defunct Russian  cosmos orbiter collided over northern Siberia causing over 1,200 new pieces of space junk. The Russian orbitor was presumably not maneuverable. The American satellite was apparently fully functional and able to execute evasive maneuvers, thus avoiding a collision if warned in advance.

The Russians blamed NASA for failing to warn of the impending collision, and NASA in turn put the blame on the Air Force. On the surface, this incident appears to be a case of error – human or computerized warning systems. But consider the following theory. 

First, the Russian government has not stated anything specific about the state of its orbitor. All citations of defunct status of that orbitor have originated from the news media. 

Second, the American communications satellite belongs to the Iridium Corporation. Remember them? In the 90s, they had a good idea, but a bad product. Their plan was to introduce a ’satellite’ mobile phone that would work anyplace on earth. They launched a number of satellites into orbit to service the phones. But when they introduced the actual phone unit, they attracted no ’sane’ buyers. For the phones to properly communicate with satellites, they had to engage an antenna that resembled a fishing rod. Not practical.

Third, the Iridium Corporation has leased their satellites, in part, to the U.S. Department of Defense. In fact, Iridium executive board includes Tom Ridge, former U.S. Secretary of Homeland Security.

Fourth, Iridium communication satellites are capable of altering course in order to avoid collision with other space objects. In fact, they have performed evasive maneuvers (by some accounts) 7 times in the past 10 or so years.

So. consider this. It is not too far-fetched to think that the Russian orbitor, rather than being defunct, was in fact a fully operational spy satellite. The U.S. Department of Defense, through its connection with Iridium Corporation via Tom Ridge, decided to take out the Russian spy orbitor. Of course, the Russians had no choice but to helplessly watch their spy satellite break into pieces because a “defunct’ satellite is not maneuverable.

I like it. If this is true, score one for the Americans.

I have not cited any sources here. I got this information from many different news articles and blogs. Google it!

Read Newspapers On Your Computer – 1981 Edition

Here’s one for all my techie friends and co-workers.

We’ve come a long way!

Interesting idea, but I’m betting it will never catch on

Credit goes to dvorak.org/blog. That’s where I saw this video first.

The Miniaturization Of Laptops – Introducing Mactini

Earth To Palin: Fruit Fly Research Is Key To Many Cures

Watch this video. This is Sarah Palin’s policy statement on US budget.

For anyone who doesn’t know about genetics research, just google it and you’ll see a vast array of publications and discoveries about the topic. Fruit fly research is the standard by which many genetic and birth defects as well as molecular biology are studied today. In fact, fruit flies have been used for protein, cell and genetic research for around 100 years. It is precisely this type of research that brings hope to areas such as autism. 

I concede that over 50% of US population is unaware of the importance of fruit fly research in the areas of genetics and molecular biology. As the mother of a Down Syndrome child, however, Sarah Palin sure doesn’t seem very educated about genetic defects and research. Doesn’t anyone fact-check her speeches? Anyone? It is clear that she’s been busy recently. She’s definitely sacrificing her family for her country – and I truly mean that in a positive and respectful way.

The Republican media machine jumped into action by saying that she was only speaking of fruit fly research as it applies to agricultural, not genetics. Please, don’t insult my intelligence! Watch the video again and listen to her words. Her condemnation of fruit fly research came in the following context: ”. . . sometimes these dollars go to projects having little or nothing to do with the public good.“

Oh, I know. Perhaps she was only objecting to fruit fly research in Paris, France. She would have no objections if it was conducted in the US. We hate the French . . . don’t we? I forget what our official policy on the French is these days. Do we like them or not? It’s so hard to keep track.

I have also read (on various blogs) that Palin does not believe in genetic research due to her religious views and, hence, her objection to it. I don’t believe that. She’s much more intelligent than many on the left portray her. I assume her children receive vaccinations which, after all, is a direct result of genetic and protein research.

I love this bit from Rachel Maddow. Both she and Keith Olbermann are a little too far to the left for my taste, but I enjoy Rachel’s funny and sometimes sassy remarks.

Here’s a good link to learn more about fruit fly research:

http://media.www.jhunewsletter.com/media/storage/paper932/news/2003/11/14/Science/Fruit.Fly.Study.Improves.Genetic.Research-2245662.shtml

My New Keyboard

This is just what I’ve been looking for.

Brilliant Study: Old Phones End Up In Drawers. Duh!

A global survey conducted by Nokia has revealed that most old mobile phones are left in drawers.

I would now like to declare a big DUH! I don’t know how much Nokia paid for this survey, but I would have taken only 1% of the money they coughed up, and had given them EXACTLY the same answer.

Only 3% of the 6,500 people interviewed for the survey said that they recycled their mobile phones (and my guess is that about half of them are lying). The good news is that only 4 percent of old phones end up in landfills. The survey further found that some people also give old phones to friends and family.

Speaking of drawers . . . If you’re a man, check out your wife’s underwear drawer. I guarantee you will find underwear in there that you’ve never, ever seen on your wife before. The second shocking discovery by you men will be that most of what you haven’t seen your wife wear is actually colorful, sexy, exotic, and very expensive. Can you say Victoria’s Secret?

I will now pause until you men come to your final and inevitable realization, especially if your wife’s name is Victoria. If those sexy lingerie are not for you, then . . .

Don’t let your wife convince you that the lingerie are for her, and that wearing them helps her feel good and sexy about herself. Trust me, that’s only partially true – the part about feeling good and sexy . . . in your absence.

Don’t worry men. It’s not all bad news. I guarantee you have in fact seen your wife wear every pair of socks that she owns. See! Everything she wears is for you and your pleasure – especially those old socks. You can go back to watching TV now!